Delayed

R&R is finally here...or not quite yet. I'm still waiting. I'm realizing that I'm not as patient a person as I thought I was! It's one thing to wait for a date that you know and can count down to, and it's a whole other beast to wait for something you have no idea when it will happen, or how. I need to learn how to not have expectations, and just accept things as they come. I'm just so excited to see my husband after 5 months! He is on his way, but the weather out East is not making it easy for him to get home. Non-functioning airports are not good for trying to get home from overseas. On the bright side (because I force myself to find it), he is getting a longer leave because of the extra travel days which is good rest for his tired body, and the longer it takes him to get here, the less days there will be left after he leaves! I've waited 5 months, what's a few more days right? Ugh...So I have been having a nice anxiety filled week so far, running errands and cleaning, trying to keep busy. He will be here soon :)

Book Blog: The Alchemist - Paulo Coelho

This was another book that I just pulled off the shelf not knowing what it was about. I had heard the name many times, seen it on booklists for years, but never knew anything about it. It was a little hard to get into right away because it was like reading a fairy tale bible story, but it actually turned about to be another spiritual read for me. A boy goes on a journey to find a hidden treasure and along the way he meets people that help him learn valuable lessons about faith, life, and love. I think the appeal of this book is that the lessons can be pretty universal depending on your religious views, probably why the book has been translated into 56 languages. The ones that stuck out to me are that you should never give up on your dreams, true love lasts despite time and distance, you should live life one day at a time and not worry about the future, you should constantly be seeking and living God's Will for your life, and that God can be found in everyone who believes in Him. I recommend reading it, it's an interesting story and not like the typical fiction that I normally read, and it's full of great reminders about the gift of life.

Book Blog: God Strong: The Military Wife's Spiritual Survival Guide - Sara Horn

I had heard good things about this book and my mom found it for me at a book sale. I think this book has actually helped change my life. Every military wife should read this book. I am new to military life, but we all go through similar struggles, things that other people don't always understand. The challenges we face may seem impossible and sometimes we feel like we can't do it, we can't live this way, but we do it because we love the amazing men in our lives and we want to support them in serving our country and helping others.

I have been praying a lot lately for patience and peace with the decisions my husband and I make, and peace with what comes our way in the future. This book has been a great addition to the prayer and attempt to really give my heart to God, letting go of my worries and trusting that my life will go according to HIS plan. It is always helpful to hear stories from other wives about the strength that they find in God that allows them to be a strong military wife, a strong woman. And it's even better to be reminded of God's promises - that he is always with us, that he has a plan for our lives that may be unknown to us. The titles of the chapters lay out these promises well:

My Strength Comes from God
Fear Blocks My Focus
I Am Not Alone
Superwomen Get Grace Too
God Is in Control
God Knows My Hurts
I Can Have Joy Despite My Circumstances
Worship Lessens My Worries
I Find My Hope In Christ

So often we feel like we know these things, but we don't actually trust in them. No matter what kind of life we find ourselves in, no matter what kind of struggles we go through, God is always there and we can find joy in any situation because of that. My whole outlook on military life has taken a turn for the better. While I still don't like the thought of deployments or being away from my family, I know that I will be ok. I'm trusting that if that's the way our lives go, it's because God has a bigger plan for us. My husband is very passionate about serving his country and helping people, and although military life is not the life I would have chosen for myself, I am blessed to have such a giving and loving husband who enjoys serving others and I am so grateful to have him in my life. I need to focus on the blessings I have been given and not give in to the fear and worry. I will continue to pray for God to strengthen me into a supportive wife, a faithful servant, a woman who is God Strong. With all the inconsistency and uncertainty that comes with military life, we always have one constant.

A Whole New Year

Thank goodness this year is finally over. So much happened this year, and it has definitely been a stressful and emotional ride. Work has been busy and a seemingly impossible deadline for an office remodel, plus planning a party that was to take place New Year's Eve in said office added a giant dollop of stress on top. BUT we pulled it off (mostly), and actually the one thing that was not done turned out to be a positive. We were supposed to have glass walls put in to separate the reception area and the offices/meeting rooms. They were not able to go in on time, but it was actually nice because it was open and roomy for the party and it was like a dollhouse because you could see into the rooms, and use the tables.

So after about 4 very short and busy weeks of construction, the ceiling collapsing, painting, stripping paint of of brick, new hardwood and carpet, installing electrical and light fixtures, moving around furniture, and building cubicles, we totally transformed the space. I don't have any before pictures, and we wish we would have taken progress pictures but we didn't have extra time or energy for that sort of thing. I can tell you though that it looks a million times better. It used to be dark and dingy with black carpet and black paint on the brick. And the prior tennant was a questionable "massage parlor" so that made it feel extra shady.

We got lucky with the furniture. About two weeks ago I had a mild panic attach thinking about how all this needed to get done, and THEN we needed to furnish the space. So I went on a used furniture hunt and hit the jackpot. $60 round tables, a desk that matched our current desks perfectly, nice looking side chairs that were in good shape, cubicles that we had actually looked at previously at another location and they magically found me again (the exact ones we wanted to buy a month ago but someone bought them out from under us), and a nice new desk chair for me. On another trip there to pick up some of this stuff I found the perfect conference room table in the back room of the furniture place, and we got a set of chairs to go with it. We got the reception love seat and chairs at IKEA and they are actually pretty comfortable for IKEA furniture.

So the furniture made me feel better, but there was also the cleaning and party prep that needed to get done. The contractors were finishing up the day before the party, there was still stuff all over the place and things like plate covers on outlets still needed to be put on. So we were down to the wire getting the place picked up, and it needed a deep clean real bad. The bathroom was probably the grossest bathroom I have ever cleaned, and I made that thing sparkle! I also scrubbed the kitchen floor on my hands and knees picking paint off with my fingernails, cleaned the fridge that had mold and other surprises in it, cleaned out all of the cupboards and drawers, washed all the windows, vacuumed both offices, and cleaned the other kitchen floor. Man that was a long day.

Here are some pictures of the new space:

 Sparkly clean bathroom complete with new shower curtain (yes we have a shower in our office)

 Clean kitchen getting set up for the party

 Reception area - love the exposed brick and the light fixture

 This will be my boss' office once the glass walls go in

The "dollhouse" view of the meeting rooms.

Yesterday morning we were busy with final clean-up and party prep. I had to go pick up the food and luckily that was right before the freezing rain started. As much as this party stressed me out and I didn't really want to be there for 6 hours making it another 12 hour day, it was a success. We had a pretty good turn out, people seemed to be enjoying themselves, and the bosses were pleased with the outcome of all of it. It feels SO good to have it all done, or at least mostly done. Hopefully next week I'll be moving into my new office with a window again. I have only a 4 day workweek left and then I have time off to be with my husband while he is home! 2011 is going to be a good year, I can feel it.

Book Blog: Never Let Me Go - Kazuo Ishiguro

I just finished this book last night and I'm not really sure what I think about it. It was one of those that I just impulsively grabbed off the shelf at the bookstore because the cover caught my eye. The back said nothing about the story, yet for some reason I felt drawn to it. It was a first person narrative that was composed mainly of memories so there was not really much of a cohesive plot line. Since I didn't know what it was about it took me a while to figure out what was going on. The story is about these children that were created as human clones to provide organ donations to "normal" humans with cancer and other diseases. They were raised in a sheltered boarding school environment, taught to do artwork, and eventually became carers and then donors. However, despite their sheltered upbringing, they still experienced relatively normal childhoods and adolescence, it was more just shrouded by a sense of mystery and unanswered questions.

I had a hard time with the seemingly lack of plot throughout the book, there was some but it was slight and slow moving. You have to read through the end to really get completely what was going on, and to really be able to step back and think about the depth of the point of the story. It's not really about the plot, it's more about the character's perceptions of reality and destiny. And also about how they and the project they were involved in was perceived by the regular world and their guardians that raised them. Now that I've finished the book I can appreciate it, but I wouldn't say I enjoyed it. More in a sense that I appreciate strange art because I know it's creative and thought-provoking, not because it's pleasing to my eye.

When I bought the book I knew there was a movie coming out, and I am proud of myself for waiting until tonight to watch the trailer. Carey Mulligan and Kiera Knightly star in it. I think this might actually be one that I like the movie better than the book because it will add a visual element. Here is the trailer if you're interested.

Can I get a sleigh ride?

Since I stayed inside basically the entire weekend (besides actually getting out for church), this morning was my first experience with the post-16+-inches-of-snow roads. My drive to work wasn't bad, but as soon as I got into uptown I was just amazed. I don't know how people live there with no driveways or garages. Parking on the street on a normal day is rough. With one side of the street partially plowed and cars buried or partially dug out on the other side, two way traffic on some streets is just not an option or you get yourself in quite the sticky maneuvering situation. Check out this car almost completely buried on Lyndale!

Most of the streets looked something like this today, the major streets with lines of cars going maybe a couple miles per hour. We were actually going slow enough on the way to lunch that the driver I was riding with was taking a video on his phone, some ladies in another car were waving, and we had time to open the car door and ask them why (the window was frozen shut). They simply wanted to wave for the video. Lanes disappeared today, only a couple cars made it through the stoplights at a time, and car engines were working hard to warm up.

It was below 0 all day today, but sunny and beautiful if you bundled up. And to think, I was supposed to be in El Paso this winter. I would have missed out on all this snow. That would be both a good and bad thing. I know I will miss it when I don't have it anymore. I think storms like this are exciting, it adds something interesting to life. However, it is COLD and it makes going anywhere so much work that it makes me just want to curl up on the couch and be lazy.

This was the front of my office this morning. You can't even see the street that the office is directly situated on. It's somewhere between the railing and the fire hydrant on the left. Hopefully it get cleared up a little more by tomorrow. Our parking lot was a challenge, people got pretty inventive with parking spaces including my sideways park in front of a giant snow pile.

Be Still

I had a whirlwind of a day. I had a 3 hour meeting on my schedule this morning, but before I could even join that I had to finish putting together an important file related to a client project. I then had to grab something to eat so my stomach wouldn't growl the whole 3 hours, grabbed my laptop, and made my way into the meeting late. That laptop gave me amazing multi-tasking ability, which I am already good at, but now I can do it to the max.

However, I got pulled out of the meeting for a call with our lawyer about a contract situation I've been working with. Then, I got side-swiped by our construction contractor on my way back to the meeting with some interesting news. With one of my coworkers out today, I was the go-to person for the contractors doing out remodeling across the hall. He took me over there, and apparently half of the ceiling had collapsed...which was not supposed to happen nor did we anticipate it happening. Luckily none of the guys were in there when it happened or this could have been a much worse problem, they had carried a load of scrap down to the truck and when they came back the ceiling was on the floor. And also luckily the section above the private office right next to it did not fall because there was someone working at a desk in there. Wouldn't that be a nice surprise? Apparently whoever previously put up the drop ceiling didn't bother to actually fasten them to the beams with wire as they are supposed to be. They were just being held up by the walls that we just ripped out. So...most of the ceiling tiles did not survive the fall, and only some of the medal grid. The only thing to do was fix it! The contractor was not very happy about that.

So back to the meeting I went, listening, participating, taking notes, emailing back and forth with our banker, answering questions on skype, and keeping an eye on facebook in case my hubby came online. After the meeting I had an equally busy afternoon which ended with me beginning to review some urgent legal documents after I had originally planned on leaving since I had tai chi tonight. So I had to rush to get those reviewed and sent on to the client, then grab some food and cram it in my mouth in 5 minutes, change in the bathroom, and go to class......to an hour where I am expected to shut off my brain and relax. Breathe. Get it touch with my chi. Move below the speed of habit. Going from this kind of a day to that is a challenge, but it is much needed. It's hard to remember to take time just to relax and breathe, and not worry or stress. It's hard to leave your burdens behind, to put your mind on hold, to trust that your problems will be resolved in time, to be still. On busy days and in life in general.

Breathe in, breathe out...

He says, “Be still, and know that I am God; 

I will be exalted among the nations, 

I will be exalted in the earth.”

Psalm 46:10